Wednesday, November 18, 2009

And next I'll be applying for a job in the design department at Victoria's Secret

In my effort to always make my house appear perfectly designed and polished (stop laughing), I would store my husband's superfluous and ridiculously redundant extra pillows under the bed.

They just didn't jive with my black and white bedding, since they were, well, not black and white.

The other night, my husband is arranging his side of the bed to lay down... Pause. Does anyone else's husband do this? Or do you do this? Like a mother bird making a nest for her babies, where every tiny little stick and feather has to be perfectly placed before you can even THINK about sitting or laying on it? Fluffing blankets, shaking pillows, straightening the sheet, for the love of all that is good and holy JUST LAY DOWN AND SHUT UP ALREADY!

Anyway, what was I saying? Oh, so my husband is floofing and fluffing and doing whatever it is that he does with all his bedding and I look over to see a cloud of dust around him like PigPen from Charlie Brown. He stands very still, letting the flying dust settle all around and on top of him... "Uh... my pillows are a little dusty," he observes. Genius.

I try not to laugh, because well, duh, and because I feel responsible for the dustiness. And the subsequent sneezing.

So I decided that if I made his pillows more attractive to match our bedding, I wouldn't have to hide them under the bed! Man, I'm smart.

I'm at the fabric store and Logan is just as happy as can be because we're making something special for Daddy and he can't wait and he loves all the pretty colored fabrics and wants to pick out the color all by himself because Dad would love a Batman pillow and then he could... Yeah.

So we're at the cutting counter where I'm also buying some pink sparkly tulle and elastic (for a different project - rest your brain trying to figure out why I would make my husband lay his head on pink sparkly tulle pillow and what the heck elastic has to do with into pillowcase-making). Logan asks the 103 year old lady helping us what the elastic is for. She proudly shows him the elastic waistband of her denim-colored non-jeans and explains what it's for.

Logan tries to locate his own elastic in the waistband of his real jeans, but can't because jeans aren't really supposed to have elastic in the waistband, unless you're 103 and work at JoAnn's Fabrics. But he did manage to find his underwear waistband.

"Like this!?" He says and gives himself a wedgie pulling half his underwear out of his pants.

"Yes, honey, just like that!" The old lady says.

We get our items and we're on our way to the checkout.

The cashier lady invetories my odd collection of fabrics and elastic and asks what we're making. Before I can even open my mouth, Logan says, "We're making underwear for my daddy!"

Yes, Logan, pink sparkly underwear made of tulle for your dad.

12 said blah blah blah:

Jen said...

LOL! I bet you made that woman's day.

Mommy24cs said...

OMG, my husband has a gazillion pillows too and yes he does the whole bedtime ritual of fluffing and stacking the pillows just right. Drives me insane!! At night one of his pillows will inevitably get in between us so I will take it and chuck it across the room! Stupid pillows!

Michelloui said...

Really cute, pink pj's! haha!

No, my husband and I dont 'nest' at bedtime, he's such a minimalist that he gets anxiety attacks if there's a pile of laundry in the room at bedtime. This doesn;t phase me--its usually his laundry so I figure the anxiety is a Good Emotion because it will Prompt Him To Do Something About It.

sherryandsteve said...

That was hilarious. I can just picture Logan with his little wedgie and granny goose peeking over...uh, probably around (due to height shrinkage) the counter to confirm the match-up.
Mike will be pretty in pink!
love,
mom

Nicole said...

LOL that is sooo funny! Did you laugh out loud at the lady? The funniest part is that I immediately pictures pink tighty whities, with the ruffles.....OMG. That's jjust scary and histerical all at the same time! I would have PAID to have been there.

Jeanne said...

Old Dog always laughs at the nesting I do as I settle down at night, but there are no extra pillows involved.

Or tulle, for that matter.

Sweet Annabelle said...

She's telling everyone that cute story!

Megan R. said...

I am totally the anal one about the bed. I can NOT go to sleep unless the covers are pulled up, and all night and tidy. I seriously make the bed every night before we get in it. It drives my husband nuts. I can't stand wadded up wrinkly sheets on my legs, and Ive been that way even as a kid. Please don't ask why I don't make it in the morning when I get up, because then I'll have to admit I'm a lazy slob.

And it would totally be hilarious if you actually DID make him a pair of pink tulle sparkly underwear!! LMFAO! I'm guessing you were making a tutu?

Synergy Girl said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! That is great!! And as to answer your question...your husband is ONE OF A KIND...I have never heard of a man "fixing his bed" before getting in it...my husband can be "In position" within seconds of entering the room...sometimes that is a pain...especially when we have forgotten to turn the heater down, or there is a light on...or....you get it....

icroak said...

I love this! I love it when kids get their minds working around something...it's always so literal and SO ADORABLE!

Joy said...

I thought that lady only worked at my Joann's.
A few years after we were married, I threw my husband's pillows away that he had since he was a boy. They were reduced to nothing but dust. He hasn't forgiven me yet. I keep telling him that sobakawa pillow is just as good as his drool soaked dustmites he use to have. Anyway, wanted to come by from Tracy P's blog and say hello.
I got to meet her in FL. What a treat.
Happy New Year,
♥ Joy

Sweet Annabelle said...

Sure do miss reading your blog! I'm posting a entry about a random weird finding at my house, and it made me think about the funny randoms you used to post.

Hope all is well!